Testimonials
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** A twenty first century Horatio Alger story! - Doug Chalmers **
** Ron Hurak reminds us of the indomitable power of the human spirit through these beautiful and poignant personal vignettes. Time and time again, he reminded me what’s most important in my own life, by sharing his. - CRB CR John Schumacher **
** Ron has created a wonderful and easy to read self help book on life that will help you put everything into perspective. His writing about his true life experiences can help guide you along a path that will help give you a reality check on your thoughts and actions and allow you to make adjustments so you too can have a rewarding and fulfilling life. This is one of those books that you will read over and over again. Great Book! - David J. Cocks **
** So Life Sucks is a fun read about what’s really important in life; a great gift idea for newer employees - Mike Grady **
** Ron Hurak’s practical approach to self-help is a breakthrough. He provides a set of exercises that helped me transform his concepts into my daily life. Why not Be Happy? It's simple! - Jim Hobbs **
** Over the years we have read or heard many words of wisdom, witticisms, and comments related to life and how one should approach its many challenges. Ron has captured and consolidated many of these “bits of advice” in an easily read format. Well done! ** - Roy Baccari
** The title of this book instantly conveys the message of “get out of the way” so real life can happen for you. Ron’s walk through life and all his shared experiences is a bible of looking inside oneself and stepping away from the negative people who surround us daily and committing oneself to reach out and attain whatever one would ever want to achieve in life. For me, the message is clear, life is very short; embrace all of its blessings and be the person you want to be each and every day. - Larry Kinlin **
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So Life Sucks. Get Over It!
by Ron Hurak
Smashwords Edition License Notes
Copyright © 2012 by Ron Hurak - All rights reserved.
This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author
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Table of Contents
Chapter 2 - How My Life Started
Chapter 4 - Happiness is the Holy Grail
Chapter 5 - You Can't Get There From Here
Chapter 7 - There Is No Such Thing as Failure
Chapter 9 - Leaders Make Decisions
Chapter 10 - What's Real and What's Make-Belief
Chapter 12 - Read About Others
Chapter 13 - Blame and Entitlement
Chapter 14 - Getting What You Want
Chapter 16 - Negative Thinking
Chapter 17 - Comparing Yourself With Others
Chapter 18 - Happiness With Others
Chapter 20 - Awkward Conversations
Chapter 21 - More Communications Stuff
Chapter 31 - Purpose of Living
Chapter 35 - Perception Versus Reality
Chapter 42 - Do Something Nice
Forward
by Larry Kinlin, a personal friend
So Life Sucks, Get Over It! The title of this book instantly conveys the message of “get out of the way” so real life can happen for you. The author is and has been my personal friend for over forty years. Ron has always been a person who gets it and now, never leaving one to feel in doubt of his message or purpose. Ron’s walk through life and all his shared experiences is a bible of looking inside oneself and stepping away from the negative people who surround us daily and committing oneself to reach out and attain whatever one would ever want to achieve in life. For me, the message is clear, Life is very short; embrace all of its blessings and be the person you want to be each and every day. I owe so much to Ron for all his unwavering support in my times of need for someone who would listen, give his advice, and then give me the freedom to go forward. Love you forever, Ron. Larry
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Acknowledgements
I dedicate this book to all the wonderful people who have been there for me throughout the years; as I have journeyed through this amazing life that I live; and a special thanks to my life partner, my best friend, my soul mate and my wife; Kay. I wouldn’t be where I am today without her love, guidance and the unselfish willingness by so many others to share their life lessons with me. Thank you.
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Chapter 1 - Introduction
Ok so your life sucks! Get over it! I understand all about having an unhappy life; even better than understanding..... I know. I have been there; done that; and own both T-shirts (red and blue).
For many people their life doesn't suck. They are happy, at peace with themselves and enjoying their life to the fullest.
“So what special gift did they get that many other people have not.... maybe including you?”
“How come they get to stand in the short line and you seem to always be at the very end of the longest one?”
That's what my goal is for this book. To share some information with you so that you not only stand at the front of the line but the line is actually one that you have created for yourself so you are always first in line. To be happy!
I am not sure if this book is a self-help guide, or a few simple tips I have been given and want to pass on or something else entirely or a combination of the three. Over the years many people have suggested I write down many of my ideas or affirmations or philosophy for living so that I can share them with others; and I have always resisted any notion that my approach to living would be of any interest to anyone else. But hey, I am a happy guy. And what the hell, maybe there’s a tidbit of stuff within these pages that just might be the tipping point for you. I can only hope that my no BS list of things to try can help you to unsuck your life!
I have intentionally kept the number of words and pages to a bare minimum as I am convinced that good ideas do not require a lot of preamble and detailed explanation.
If the idea doesn’t fly off the page and immediately strike you in the head, then adding more words will usually not alter that first impression. This book is not about me but I feel it is required of me to add some credibility to what I am about to share in this book, so I need to provide some background on my own life to illustrate that if I can have a life that doesn't suck, you can too!
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Chapter 2 - How My Life Started
I was born in Winnipeg Manitoba (Canada) in 1950. My mother was an orphan who escaped the brutality of that system by getting married at sixteen to a man who had no business being married or a parent. He was but a kid himself and from the little I know of him a mixed up angry person at that.
Me at three
Four kids later, I being the third in line, my father abandon us all. I was too young to even remember him. He passed away fairly young, so I never met him. Although I didn't at the time or even for many years later in my life, I thank him for bringing me into this life. In the late 40s and early 50s was not a great time to be a single mother with four boys to rise. Social programs for people like my mother and her four kids were only in their infancy. Qualifying for government assistance so that my mother could put a roof over our heads and feed us was cruel and made no sense. I believe the system has not changed much over the past 50 years, but I hope I am wrong. Guess that makes me a liberal at heart.
My mother understood the life of an orphaned child at that time. Unless you have been living under a rock, you've heard the horrifying stories of abuse that the children of that time had to endure at the hands of those running the institutions. Once again, I was too young to understand why my mother decided to keep her four kids and not put us up for adoption and it was many years later and after she passed that I finally figured it out. She never spoke about it while alive. Besides her tenacity my mother had the gift of sewing.
Women at that time (the 40s and 50s) rarely had jobs of social significance and with little formal school her only option was to use her few gifts to earn a living and support her four kids. Once again, I was too young to understand the hardship she decided to take on. It would have been so much easier for her to just drop us off at an orphanage and be on her way.
That wasn't the decision she was going to make. I never fully realized her motivation until after she died so although it's a little late, thanks mom. So there I was with a very young mother who has four young kids, abandoned by her husband and at a time when society cared little for those who found themselves in this plight.
Little did I know at the time that my early life was not going to be a bowl of cherries! My mother had no parents to teach her how to be one. In fact her only experience with raising children was to be harsh (being kind with my choice of words). It was how she was raised so her handbook on parent do's and don'ts was limited. Raising four boys is no piece of cake regardless of one's social status so I am really amazed I survived. In fact, my oldest brother did not and took his life when he was just 36 years old.
Being that he was the oldest I think it took the worst of it and life for him was not even something you would wish for your enemies. For the purposes of the message I hope to deliver via this writing, it is irrelevant to describe the living conditions for my first fourteen years of life in great detail. Let's just say that it was on the extreme side of tough. However I do believe it would be of value to share some of my experiences to make a point later in this book.
My mother was a hard worker but regardless of how hard she worked, we were beyond poor. Paying for rent and buying food for four kids was a constant balancing act. We moved a lot. Landlords in the neighbourhoods I grew up in had little sympathy for tenants who could not pay their way. Food was not always plentiful and only the most meagre of items were standard fair for our daily menu. Even today I hate potato soup!
Winnipeg is a harsh place in the winter. Temperatures in the winter time can reach 20 to 30 below zero and even colder. Our accommodations always lacked modern heating systems so wood and coal were often the only option to stay warm and suppliers wanted cash up front before delivery. My mother wasn't always in a position to buy heating fuel so there were times when we spent indoors with our winter parkas on to stay warm. Nights were particularly difficult.
My mother enrolled me in school a year earlier than I was qualified to attend. She needed a way to lessen her parental duties so she could work more hours. I don't know how she did it, but she did manage to fool the system and I was in school way before I should have been. Being one year younger than the rest of the class doesn’t seem like a big deal, but the difference between age four and age five is 20% and it was a very challenging time for me.
I was small for my age to begin with and being younger than everyone else meant tough days ahead. Bullying in the intercity schools that had teens still in grade four or five only made the situation worst. So bullying for me was just about everywhere I happened to be standing, either at school, at home or with my two older brothers. I had security issues and that constant fear made growing up and learning difficult at best. Teachers spent more time trying to keep some sense of order in the classroom which meant teaching was often third or fourth on their list of priorities. Needless to say I found everything about school tough. My mother worked long hours so she was rarely home and I was left either alone to fend for myself or in the care of my two bullying brothers. My life sucked!
This continued throughout my entire life at school. When I was around twelve or thirteen, my mother decided to marry again. I am confident she was running out of parental patience and probably everything else and thought a man would add some sense of stability in her life. Made sense! A man in her life meant more income and someone to help raise the kids. Unfortunately the kind of men my mother would attract would have their own suitcase of issues and this was certainly the case with her choice.
He was uneducated, a victim of world war two and from what I could tell, a hard worker. It was shortly after their marriage that another pregnancy came along and yet another child to raise, a girl this time. Her new husband and my new step farther was from Europe and his customs and behaviours were a reflection of the 'old' Europe were wives where obedient and the children too. Harsh punishment for any misbehaviour was the common practice in this man's life so now I had a new bully in my life. Turns out he was a mean drunk too!
Today, I am convinced that he is a good person but that suitcase of issues he dragged around earlier in my life was controlling his every behaviour and in most cases that behaviour was anything but kind, especially to four kids that were not of his own making.
A rare photo of my mother and me